my thoughts are dead I have no thoughts without you. I love you and my children but they don't need me anymore and I will always need you please let GOD no how much I need to be with you and not here on earth doing nothing. just waiting to join you and hoping the kids come to see me once in a while but of course charles has come twice and raymond twice carol twice hazel three or four and crystal never and she is the one who needs to move with me but she wont I just hope that she isn't being abused like before but all I can do is pray for her and also for Crystal and Holly to become close as I no they must miss each other they were to close to not talk and so pray to GOD to help with that and not to hurt Crystal anymore in life.